After school, I went straight to a university in Germany – with all the expectations a freshling had for his uni life. Parties, girls and a decent start of my career as a mechanical engineer. I didn’t even do any real research about the university; I knew that I wanted to study and that I liked mechanical courses. In my eight months of my exciting new journey, I got my very first girlfriend, who I met in my home country.
Witty, good looking and one year younger than me. Ten months later I quit university. I was less than chuffed with the city, the education and the exciting student life, that everybody talked about. Back to my roots, I started to look for a job since I didn’t know what to do with my future. Lost and a big couch potato. One day, our commune-newspaper had a job offer for the local child care center as an educator replacement. It was good to get out and do so something compared to my last four months, jobless and playing “housewife” for the family. A month later at the childcare, I received a job offer from the bank as a digital product developer and tester. Two weeks into the job, my girlfriend broke up. Mentally, at the lowest, I started to look for education programs at universities which were close to the university she wanted to go and found some. It became a mission for me to leave my job after some months, move to another city and study again. In the meantime, I wanted to invest my time into productive things.
Since I’ve been traveling a lot with my ex-girlfriend, I wanted to continue this journey on my own. I hoped to replace the empty feelings after a breakup with new emotions and memories. So I called up my older brother who lives in Zurich if I could come over for a weekend. To cheer me up, he gave me the book “So good they can’t ignore you” in which the author Cal Newport explains why following your passion is dangerous and in order to have a satisfying job you should build up skills so good, that you take over the control of your work. In Zurich, my brother and I found a painting that we both liked a lot, but it was unaffordable. The idea of owning this picture was too satisfying that I made it as a mission to repaint it and give it as a Christmas gift to my brother – it turned out that I was an adequate painter. Back from Zurich with two days partying and a small fight, I booked a flight to Vienna to visit my old friend Alex. During the Christmas holidays, I benefited from the local airline promotions and booked flights to Copenhagen, Stockholm, Hamburg and Dublin. New years eve came closer and closer. It was the time of the year again where our friends become the “maybe” repliers, who don’t want to stick to a plan because the best party could wait around the corner. Thus chose I not to celebrate the “Happy new year” moment with my closest, but with people, I haven’t met yet.
My best option to do so was to find somebody on Couchsurfing*.
Luckily I found one and two weeks later was I on the plane to Copenhagen.
My job at the bank requires from me to attend courses and exams because of local and European regulations, regarding continue working as a bank employee (safety issues). I passed the first rounds, and it was time again for my next flight in February to Copenhagen. But, this time I was staying over with two strangers in Malmö which is a city in Sweden on the other to Copenhagen.
Here I am now, sitting at my desk in my room in which I lived for more than 21 years in my parent’s house. Young, with a steady and well-paid job at a bank working for the government. Some youngsters envy me for what I’ve got. I’m well aware of this, but I’m still far away from being happy without a purpose, depressed and frustrated.
I once read that there are three things in life which are the roots of depression:
health, relationship, wealth